The HG shift
Can someone take me back to the clouded la la land of the fuzzy part of dating!?
I think the whirlwind of passion and whoo has taken a bit out of me and I am sliding into this more grounded truth space of seeing things as they are and wondering what that actually is or what it means.
I think I am finally getting to start to know HG and that part is kind of intense because it means I have to think, rather than just feel.
Don't get me wrong he is flipping awesome-- hot, sexy , available , dreamy, a communicator,
responsible, smart all of that has not changed.... I think I have may have changed or I'm just kind of waking up from punch drunk love.
Last weekend we had this very late night with friends, awesome sex, no sleep and then a very random concerned comment to me at 830 am on negative 3 hours sleep as he is walking out the door to go surf with his bff : "hey you okay? ....I'm sensing this distance between us..."
SERIOUSLY? hello we're on date #11 or so and it is FAR too early in all this to be feeling any "distance" or issue or whatever right? Or is it just me being sleep deprived and bitchy and contemplating the bitter happy of it all.
After a day later much clearer and nicer mind and discussion on the whole sleeping over (pulled, until further notice) and the random distance comment, i come to learn HG's ex GF cheated on him hence the wave of not so trusting unconscious behavior and my very heightened awareness about everything that came before that.
I'm in deep pondering mode. Crazy how revelation of that one thing can really shine light on so many other things and then you sit wondering what to do with it all.
I'm wondering what to do with it all.
BFF made a good suggestion, share, be honest and just be in the present.
I'm trying, but I am soooooooooo wanting to be analytical.