All This Looking Good Leads To Sex, Dating, Booty Calls… by SK
All This Looking Good Leads To Sex, Dating, Booty Calls…
And The Unavoidable Pile Up Of Summer Relationship Gray Areas.
Summer is here, it’s hot, glorious and it seems everyone is prancing around in his or her finest “I’ve been working on this body” look in hopes of getting a chance to show it off one way or another sans clothing. Let’s go ahead and just be honest, even those not so inclined to exercise are out and about, feeling more desirable than ever.
Yep, we’re really seeing a whole lots skin, (in some cases far too much skin) sexy summer dresses are being pulled from the racks, women everywhere are featuring perfectly manicured toes and the style savvy sandal of the moment. Attractive, firm bodied guys are sporting this seasons cool threads, maybe even giving us peek of a perfectly shaped shoulder here and there—and that undeniable “I’m gonna to get some” sparkle is in everyone’s eyes. Yep, gym membership cards are actually being utilized, beds are being made pre evenings out, and self tanner sales are at their height—welcome to summer 08!
Let’s face it, universal fact 101, come June first we all arrive at supermodel status (at least in our heads) and it’s on! Summer relationship game time.
Which brings me to the itty-bitty bitter reality of all this looking good: sex, dating, booty calls and the unavoidable summers slew of interpersonal relationship gray areas.
I try to encourage friends to keep things simple with my revised philosophy year after year: “there are no rules, so break 'em all, and have no expectations.” Yeah, yeah, I know I sound like a guy. Trust me, I definitely embrace the idea of love as much as the next girl, and I fully love being in love and even welcome the unpredictable sometime harrowing range of emotions that come with being in love. The break up part not so much but the shiny love part yes, yes, yes. But we can all agree, you have to know when a kiss is just a kiss, and sex is just pure sexy, sex. There are no guarantees and that is secretly part of the attraction for most of us, isn’t it? As I learned recently in a morning after chat with a few friends, apparently not.
Unavoidable summer relationship gray area #1: You may be the one but you’re not the only one.
A dear friend of mine who takes part in the frequent booty call met a girl a few weekends ago and it appeared that mister “I dig a good booty call” didn’t get the “you may be the one, but you’re probably not the only one” unwritten, booty call rule memo.
Mister booty call and his (suddenly now slutty) girl of choice for the evening had a wondrous night of sexiness, which led to a morning, filled of the same…. Reports filed say “great sex…fun night” actually. Mission accomplished right? High fives all around for the guys, good for the both if you… Well, not so fast on the high fives -- it’s reported that Miss Booty Call was out that NEXT evening with a different guy, (who both parties knew) also known as “mutual friend.” My friend well, didn’t really dig this unplanned threesome at the same bar, same situation. Awkward yes, illegal no.
I think the solution here is a simple “official booty call questionnaire” which can be texted to
both parties are required to fill out prior to the act of sharing saliva, as a means to avoid any next day confusion and keep the booty call concept pure.
Unavoidable summer relationship gray area #2:
The booty call has been going on for 2 years
News flash: This can no longer be filed as an official booty call,
It started almost two summers ago!
I have tried to tell my girlfriend that in the real world that regardless if she and her guy see each other maybe once or twice a month this is called a “relationship”—actually, it’s called giving the milk away for free and well, denial.
I will leave it at that and let her figure out that she just might be letting mister right slide on by while she’s with mister right now. She’s amazing, sexy and as much as I dig that her womanly needs are being full filled on a regular basis, I simply believe she deserves the full ticket.
Unavoidable summer relationship gray area #3: You’d actually be a great couple, however not in this lifetime.
Certain seasons of the year you just find each other naked and horizontal, full of chemistry and heated bursts of passion. A few flirty texts here and there and random, spontaneous mutually perfect timing moments together. None of the daily check in or even discussion of any of that, just a sweet, deep exchange of simple, sexy “relations” mutual respect, satisfying and to the point.
Almost the perfect booty call. …However, really the moment you play back and forth text, it’s not really a booty call. And if you have mutual friends, and you’re the type who prefers to “keep it under the radar” -- the minute it isn’t, well, the secret sneaky party is o-v-e-r and so is the fun part in my opinion.
So, what are all those set on a little summer fling to do?
A fellow summer lover Sherry shared once that not all summer loves are meant to last. In a way, that's part of what makes it all so perfect -- they can be as fleeting as the evening itself. If your fling gets flung, the kindest thing you can do for yourself is to kiss it goodbye and wish it well and know that you'll live to fling again –
I say by the time next weekend rolls up actually, and that my friend is a true old school one-night stand.